Aubree is the latest in our house to go down with whatever bug is going around. First me, then Terri, now Aubree is feeling rather puny. She was feeling bad last night, and when I went in to wake her up this morning it was even worse. So I called into work and stayed home to take care of her. She isn’t old enough to stay home by herself

My good friend Thomai mentioned in a previous comment the stigma attached to single motherhood and how single fathers are viewed as heroic for being the caregiver to their children. There is much truth in what she says. People often have reacted in surprise and admiration when finding out that I was raising my kids. I consider myself in no way a hero…just a parent. I do think that the experience has made me more sensitive to the single parents I interact with on a daily basis.

But it does cut the other way sometimes and this is a perfect example. Some years ago the same thing occurred as it did today. Aubree was very young, very sick, and I had to stay home to take care of her. There was no one else available who could do so, and I stayed home to tend to her needs. I was working in an administrative position and some time after I returned to work the word came to me that one of my central office supervisors was displeased that I had taken those days off. There was a strong presumption, me being a male and an administrator, that I should simply have someone else available for such things. Day care doesn’t take sick kids, my dad was very ill and couldn’t risk having a sick child in the same house, and I had no one else. When I confronted the supervisor with this set of facts and asked him what I should’ve done in that situation, he said, “I’m sorry for saying anything but it just struck me as odd.” Odd that I would take care of my kids? I think it was just odd to him that a man would handle tending a sick child. I was tempted to tell him, “pay me more and I’ll hire a nanny!”

But hey….that is nothing compared to those looks I get when I take her to the nail salon!
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