A large part of my meeting with Patrick's teachers yesterday was spent discussing his future, specifically the next few years. This is a questions that has nagged at me throughout his childhood. Although you can never be sure what will become of any child, for someone like Patrick this is a complex question.

For those who are not aware, my son Patrick is 14 years old and in the 9th grade. He has formal diagnoses of Pervasive Developmental Disorder and a place on the autism spectrum of disorders. He is impulsive and can be very immature for his age. He struggles in social situations with peers his own age. He takes Concerta to help with his impulse control and to be able to focus on classwork.

My son is also very bright. His intelligence is in the normal range and he is close to grade level in reading and at grade level in math. He is capable of following complex instructions and diagrams, loves to assemble anything, enjoys taking things apart and putting them back together, and has an incredibly fertile imagination. You should see the things he can build with a coat hanger, a toilet paper roll, a box, and some tape. He always has inventions on his mind. He told his teacher he was going to create something to help her......some anti-wrinkle cream!

In spite of his quirks, most people who spend a lot of time with him learn to love him. His teachers always love him. He intrigues them and he has a way of getting into your heart. He can alternately be very affectionate and very stubborn. He does very well with a structured routine and it is very disconcerting to him when that routine is altered.

One of the things we discussed was possible work assignments for Patrick when he turns sixteen. There are a variety of options and opportunities, ranging from grounds/maintenance to cafeteria/kitchen to some type of jobs in retail stores. There are programs that allow him to spend part of his school day working and actually earning money. One thing Patrick definitely appreciates is the value of money!

There are also various programs to help him find meaningful training and work when he turns eighteen. At this point I don't know precisely what that will look like. It brings up some questions. Will Patrick ever be able to live outside my home? If so, in what type of situation? Will he be able to work or will he draw disability instead? What type of opportunities are out there for him? What is my role in that?

I know that I will have to be there for Patrick in ways that most parents are not for their adult children. On one hand it scares me to death to think of him living away from me. But I also worry that if he is totally dependent on me as an adult, what happens when I am no longer around?

I've thought about these questions most of his life but have always put them aside. The time is now approaching where it is time to consider all of this. Patrick is my son and I love him to the depths of my soul. I want him to have every possible opportunity and I want him to have a safe, stable, and secure future.

There is much to ponder.
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